This is a piece of writing I have been working on for a long time. I made sure it matches the success criteria and also relates to me.
- Title: Relates to events / experiences being retold
- Orientation or Introduction: Provides information about who, when, where and why,
- Events - in order of time - in paragraphs with supporting details
- Personal Comment: sums up the events / experiences
- Past tense - with time words e.g. by now, during, then, after that and past tense verbs e.g. climbed, found, leapt, clambered, was
- Choosing the best words as you can
- Your best punctuation and spelling
- My Goal: Write a variety of simple, compound and complex sentences correctly.
Colgate Games 2015
The stadium stood in front of us as we approached the registration room. Wellington was sunny this time round. My heart was pumping but to be honest I thought mum was more nervous than me. I received my shirt and band and prepared for the next day.
The next day came upon us as we got ready for my first event, I prepared myself for the following race (200m), my coach William warmed Stella and I before the officials called us to the tent.
The tent stunk like sweaty competitors as the air could not flow through it. The officials were young and all of them wore nikes, some wore whistles around their necks and most of the girls wore bracelets.
One by one we walked onto the track, it was hotter than usual, blocks were lined in each lane. Cameron, Coby and Connor stood at the barrier cheering, I smiled but at that same time I was more nervous than anything.
The race began with a boom, my feet bursted out of the blocks and I was away. Coming down the straight, I could hear mum's voice yelling like crazy. My legs took one step and by this time I had crossed the line.
A counter was given, I looked 2nd place, that's alright I guess. Later that evening I looked at the results window, my name was written tidily in arial font saying I had successfully made it into semi finals.
Mum and I jogged back to the warm up area, I suited up (put my spikes on) and stretched. I hugged mum before entering the tent again, lines of girls sat waiting for the same race and by now my head was spinning with anxiousness.
I walked out onto the track, blocks were lined in each lane messier than before. “On your marks, set, bang!” I was gone like a tiger. I sprinted around the bend and down the straight my legs stung and my arms stiffened. My mind quoted your body can do anything it's your mind you have to convince.
I crossed the finish line 5th. Mum smiled with happiness well William congratulated me, and although I didn’t make it to the 200m finals I was very proud of myself.
Day 1 was a challenging, competitive and fun day well day 2 and 3 are next to reveal. Not only did I qualify finalist in both 100m and High Jump, I have next year to come.